The Lies

Image result for little kid on internet

I had the most interesting conversation with my oldest grandson recently.  We were discussing school and goals.  He is under the impression that having a YouTube page and followers is a career goal.  So I challenged him to give me specific examples of this actually working.

He cited some 17 year old boy that “quit high school, has a bunch of followers, and is making millions.  He even bought his mom a new house.”  Hmm…really?  I countered with, “but how do you KNOW he’s really making millions?”  To which he replied, “because his mom said so.”  Hmmm…this was heading down an interesting road.  I said, “you don’t think his mom would say anything to help his rating?”  And then the statement I feared, “Mom’s don’t lie!”  Wow…where to go…”Need I remind you of the Santa Claus incident?”  Yes, I went there!

Now, this is not the first time I have heard this line of thinking.  We have seniors writing senior papers about this career goal.  So I will concede that there are people with enough internet followers that they are making SOME money.  But millions?  In actual money…like money you could pay the bills with…not free stuff?

Our next step was for me to “walk down this road” with him.  So I said, “let’s assume that there is someone making millions with a YouTube channel.  What specifically could you offer that isn’t already out there?”  He said, “I want to make a YouTube channel of me playing my video games.”  Hmmm….next problem.  These kids really believe that they can make millions playing a game.  I stated that this was already done.  He needed something unique…not eating Tide Pods…not doing stupid stuff…but a real unique “need” for the world.  I even gave real solutions…find a math problem you yourself couldn’t solve and show how to solve it…find a real world problem and find a solution…something actually useful.

I know that media is the best babysitter ever…I get it!  I totally get it!   Matter of fact, I’m a little jealous it wasn’t around when I raised my own children.  And I’ve witnessed the on-off switch that happens when a child is handed the cell phone.  It’s magic!  So it’s no wonder that kids are enamored with the hopes of finding eternal “magic” and career possibilities with this “thing” that can make you millions without any real work.

And if you haven’t watched kids “watch” media these days, you’re missing the boat.  They are no longer interested in movies and music.  They want to watch real people doing real things…for hours!  Media is changing so quickly and so are our kids.  The things we feared on the Internet 10 years ago are no longer of interest to our kids.  They’re in awe of fellow teens doing stupid stuff.  Once again, I don’t know the answer to this dilemma…I just know that it is one.  And if you think you’re kids aren’t part of this…what did Santa bring you last year?

 

Cellular Detox

Ugh!  Day 4 of pneumonia and strep is killing me!  And not in the terrible-to-be-sick kind of way, but in the bored-out-of-my-mind way. I have so many meds I need one of those pill reminder boxes. The upside is I haven’t been hungry so it’s possibly the only weight loss plan that might actually work for me.  Thus this experiment!

Image result for cell phone detox

Recently I had my students watch a couple of videos that are very thought-provoking. One is “Are you living an InstaLIE?”

The other video is by Simon Sinek and he discusses Millennials in the workplace.  This is a fascinating video.  Please take the time to watch it to the end because what he says should terrify you.

As I ponder my own cell phone use, I wonder, “Am I addicted?”  So, in pursuit of answers, I downloaded an app to track my cell phone usage.  Ick!  Trust me when I say that you will be stunned by your usage.  I kept track for several days and it depressed me terribly.  And if I’m addicted, what does that say for my kids?

All of these things did make me more aware of the down moments when I would just reach for my phone because I was bored.  I’m trying to be more mindful of that and force myself to get up and do something…anything but be a passive participant in my own life.

For the record (and in the spirit of transparency), I deleted that app about a week later…nobody needs that kind of negativity in their life.  I’m searching for JOY and evidently it isn’t at my fingertips.

After Midnight

My grandmother always said “nothing good happens after midnight!” What is “good” is very relative and changes with age.

My 20 year old self: “oh my! We don’t even get dressed to go out until dark!” This is hysterical now because I can’t drive after dark…well I can…I just shouldn’t.

To my 19 year old son: “please don’t get in any trouble! And if you do, call your dad!:

And here is the reality of that statement…after 10pm, I’ve likely taken my Ambien and will not remember a single, solitary thing we talked about.

Hence this conversation with my BFF at lunch yesterday:

Me: we still going to Harrah’s Casino Thursday?

BFF: huh? (Total confusion)

Me: we had a whole conversation last night when you texted me after midnight.

BFF: we did?

Me: uh, yes we did. We talked about taking a day trip; what time we should leave; what ur wearing to a job interview tomorrow; a text you had earlier with a mutual friend…along with pics!

BFF: (getting her phone out and scrolling messages) hmmm…guess we did!

Me: Ambien?

In her defense, she’s a newbie to the Ambien amnesia. I can say that because I DID remember the conversation.  Matter of fact, I was already dreaming of what to do with my winnings.  But as a good friend I had shared my own hilarious experiences.

For example, Lord forbid you be on my shit list AND in my contact’s list. Let’s just say more than one man has disappeared from my life under what seemed like an un-called for disappearing act.

Giving essay writing advice to my son for his college essays…he DID pass English but barely and clearly not on the merits of my advice.

Personal advice…write your blog anytime the mood hits you, but DON’T post until morning! Trust me on this!

Ambien is like a truth serum so if you don’t want to know exactly what I think, don’t ask me after 10pm. On the other hand, if you’re my kid and you want permission or money, it’s hands-down your better option.

And for the love of God, do not use me as your one phone call from jail…I will often wonder why you’ve disappeared from my life so unexpectedly. And you will wonder where the hell I am, because I will possibly say I’m on my way to get you and go back to sleep. I’m so sorry! Don’t take Ambien while you’re in jail.

Anyone that calls me late at night and knows me well starts with “have you taken your Ambien yet?” before they proceed. I have smart friends.

Like all things in life…it’s relative. Best sleep of my life and a great excuse to tell it like it is!  If this is anything like my future, old lady, tell it like it is, self…I like it!  After all, “the truth will set you free” they say…unless you’re in jail…remember, don’t call me after 10pm!